This is an issue I have had for quite a while, at least 4 years. Whenever I masturbate and I get close to finishing, I always end up pointing my toes and tensing my calves really hard. Sometimes my legs shake a lot too. I don't know if it started as a natural reaction, but now it almost feels like a prerequisite to having an orgasm. I can masturbate for about 45 minutes and not really get anywhere, or I can consciously do the leg thing and cum within 5-10 minutes, regardless of any other stimulus.
This wouldn't be that big of an issue if it were just a secret cheat code I could use to get there faster, but like I said it's basically required. It also causes really bad leg cramps while masturbating every now and then, which sucks.
I have a boyfriend now who I really like and want to be able to orgasm with. The past few times we've had sex though, I've had to finish myself just because I wasn't in a position where my legs could tense up or shake very much. I was enjoying the sex a lot and got close to cumming from it, but it was the fact I couldn’t do the specific habit that prevented me from fully getting there (nothing to do with my partner at all).
This has been a consistent issue with pretty much every partner I've had over the past 4 years, and the fact that I haven’t been able to orgasm from someone else stimulating me has made me feel a bit insecure.
How could I potentially learn to orgasm without needing to tense my legs? Is this something anyone else has experienced, and if so what advice do you have on how to deal with it? Even just a name for what it's called or a reference for where to look for more advice would be really helpful (Google doesn't have much for "I can't cum without pointing my toes" lol).
2 comments
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Have a look at r/syntribation, it seems similar to what you’re describing with the leg tension.
Also see the term “coregasm”. Not the same part of the body, but another way people can reach orgasm through muscle tension.
I think the general advice in the case of syntribation is to re-train yourself to have orgasms another way. That means holding off and not having orgasms the way you’re used to, and only experimenting with new types of stimulation. After masturbating regularly but not having orgasms for a few weeks, you’re likely to be primed to have them, and getting better at finding the pleasure in other types of stimulation.