How do you respond when a man you don’t know calls you “sweetie”?
April 13, 2026
The more unhinged of a response, the better.
46 comments
I’ll one up him. Call him sugar tits or something
“thanks, gramps”
Don’t call me that again.
If they don’t listen, I don’t talk anymore to them. Sorry, not unhinged. I just really don’t like being patronised or cuteified If I don’t want it.
“Don’t call me that”
I don’t think much of it to be honest, I feel like they’re saying it to be polite
I just don’t acknowledge it because I know they say it to be.. what they think is “nice.” I don’t like it but will tolerate it
Honest, maybe its just me, but I have found its 100% better to never acknowledge it. They unravel themselves before your eyes and generally don’t say it more than once or twice. Anytime I have said anything they are outlandishly rude or have continued saying it on purpose to annoy me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I would ask him why does he call me sweetie and see how it goes. When you ask people to explain their behaviour, a shift begins.
1000% depends on the tone and body language of the person. Like a 20 year old clearly flirting me calling me sweetie the response is “sorry I have a sweetheart at home hope you get that lucky some day.” An old man who’s is clearly trying to be polite or confusing me for his kid or grand kid. “What are you looking for/ what’s up.” Normally they just want to pet my dog and be on their way… same as if a woman asked if it was someone my age or younger using it in a demeaning fashion I would call it out or ignore it. If it was an older person looking for conversation or help of course I’m going to interact like it’s normal for them.
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I don’t mind it if it’s from an older man haha now if it was someone around my age….😟😮🤨
I’m a server, so this happens to me often. Unfortunately I won’t risk the tip, so even if it feels gross, just smile.
i would literally just say
No
I would ignore it unless it was said in a way to be purposely condescending.
Well context is a little necessary. My code of conduct for life includes: when it is safe to do so, judge slowly.
I was in a little town in Georgia (USA) once where everyone called everyone by sweetie, darlin’, honey, or what have you. It would have been kind of ridiculous to be upset about a language convention in a place where they were just trying to make sure I was staying hydrated.
On the other hand, I have been called sweetie when I was acting as an advanced computer hardware repair, and so I then called him “kiddo.” He was like 50, and I was 29. Lol
Ok I know exactly what I would do, because this happened to me over a decade ago.
Some dude called me sweetie and I literally responded “Sweetie?” with a LOOK. We were both in an elevator and he lost his mind on me. I felt trapped. On the elevator ride up, He told me I should be grateful and then called me a C word TWICE.
I had to get back in the elevator to go back down and his friend apologized to me for his behavior. I went to down to my leasing office and turns out, he was a San Diego Padres baseball player known for being an absolute jerk.
I just act like they’re not talking to me lol. I ain’t sweetie, must be talking to someone else
I’m from the south. It will happen. It doesn’t bother me.
Call him sweetie back sarcastically
It depends on the tonality, but usually men who call me sweetie give off caring energy, so I usually just smile and it makes me feel taken care of. If it’s said creepy, my eyebrows get real weird lol
“Oh, actually my name is [my name]!” I say it nicely one time, and after that I continually repeat it until they say it correctly.
If I don’t want them to have my name, I say something like “Oh, Ms. is fine!”
Now, occasionally I do make an exception. I’m only really going to correct them if I catch a vibe of condescension, rudeness, etc. If it feels like this is just the way he talks then I’ll hold back.
I just hit them with “thanks, pumpkin” and keep walking 😭
Interestingly I found people in New England (more rural areas) might say “what can I get you, darlin’ “ and I didn’t find it at all creepy. But I am 60+ female. As long as they don’t leer, don’t sound like Quagmire (giggety) it felt innocent.
I don’t really mind as long as it’s not meant to be condescending and doesn’t go any further.
I don’t lol because ew
Ignore it. But here’s the thing, most of the time it’s sweet. So I like it. For example, is he old enough to be my father or Grandpa? Usually it’s a positive thing. Now, if the guy is being a douchebag, I typically ignore it but sometimes, it hits a nerve and I will act in a way that is either embarrassing to him or I act in a way that makes him think I pity him. He typically gets annoyed and walks away.
I wish i new how to answer, i just grumble internally. Although im in the uk so its normally darling, rather than sweetie.
I can usually tell intention by tone and body language. If it’s a power play or condescending, I say I’m not your sweety, if it’s someone older or someone who doesn’t mean it negatively, I usually smile and go with the warmth.
I’m a server and get it a lot. Normally just smile and go with it. Tips are my life lol
I don’t care enough to respond. I usually don’t even notice it.
“I’m generally more salty”
I don’t.
I’ve almost always had this come up at work, and it’s usually elderly men who are otherwise being respectful and soliciting my help or opinion about something. They don’t remember my name but remember me as a competent person who can be relied on. I ignore it or just say, “You know, I don’t know that we’ve ever introduced ourselves, I’m vizslalvr lastname.”
I’m almost 40 now and it happens less because they learned who I was and I’m too old for sweetie or whatever other diminutive bullshit they come up with. But 85% of them never sweetied me again, and those that did eventually got my name right.
For entire strangers in non-work situations, I just ignore them entirely. If a response is absolutely required, I respond and then call them something equally diminutive, Boomer, or Steve, depending on their age. Dunno why I settled on Steve, but they either get the point or correct me. If they correct me I say, “And I’m not a sweetie, what’s your point?”
Loudly: “sweetie? I don’t like pet names!” Then make serious eye contact with someone else and move away.
If it’s likely safe to do so, he’s getting a name back. Context of the moment will decide if it’s a gaudy ‘sweetheart’ or if it’s plain and profane. Swear like a sailor if I gotta.
If the vibes are off, suddenly it’s all hands on deck to make sure I’m in a public place with people or getting someone on the phone yesterday.
“Yes, snookums?”
nothing because i really don’t mind it
The same as women who think its cute to call everyone honey, sweetie, baby. I was born and raised in the south MS, TN, AL, i still dont like it.
I dont know you, dont call me that. Its not “cute”, it doesnt make me trust you, my love language isnt validation.
depends, if he looks like a good person it doesn’t bother me. but if he gives off strong creep vibes i just walk away.
Sugarbritches. Sweetlips. Boy.
I call him little buddy
Champ, cowboy, and buddy are my go-to retaliation pet names for men. Champ usually hits the hardest.
I say, “please don’t call me that”. I don’t GAF how that makes them feel about it.
“Don’t call me sweetie. I don’t know you. It’s creepy.”
I have a patient who has a “crush” on me. He has asked me out, of which I said no, I am married. He said, oh, unless you’re ok with that. I said no again. He now has coffee/lunch 4 – 5 days a week at the coffee shop across from my office and just watches. The other day I went over to grab a can of soft drink from the shop and he very over familiarly said, “Hello darling”, (after i said hello to a couple of people who were all my patients). I just stopped walking, put on a blank face and stared him directly in the eyes. I didn’t say anything and didn’t acknowledge his words, but staring at someone who pushes your boundaries right in the eyes with no emotions absolutely puts the comment back on them. It draws attention to the ludicrousness of what they have said, the inappropriateness of the words. Silence is so much more powerful. After about 2 – 3 seconds, I went about my business in the shop. No words, nothing. I haven’t seen him again after a year of his antics. It works every time. Silence, and hold your stare.
46 comments
I’ll one up him. Call him sugar tits or something
“thanks, gramps”
Don’t call me that again.
If they don’t listen, I don’t talk anymore to them. Sorry, not unhinged. I just really don’t like being patronised or cuteified If I don’t want it.
“Don’t call me that”
I don’t think much of it to be honest, I feel like they’re saying it to be polite
I just don’t acknowledge it because I know they say it to be.. what they think is “nice.” I don’t like it but will tolerate it
Honest, maybe its just me, but I have found its 100% better to never acknowledge it. They unravel themselves before your eyes and generally don’t say it more than once or twice. Anytime I have said anything they are outlandishly rude or have continued saying it on purpose to annoy me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I would ask him why does he call me sweetie and see how it goes. When you ask people to explain their behaviour, a shift begins.
1000% depends on the tone and body language of the person. Like a 20 year old clearly flirting me calling me sweetie the response is “sorry I have a sweetheart at home hope you get that lucky some day.” An old man who’s is clearly trying to be polite or confusing me for his kid or grand kid. “What are you looking for/ what’s up.” Normally they just want to pet my dog and be on their way… same as if a woman asked if it was someone my age or younger using it in a demeaning fashion I would call it out or ignore it. If it was an older person looking for conversation or help of course I’m going to interact like it’s normal for them.
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I don’t mind it if it’s from an older man haha now if it was someone around my age….😟😮🤨
I’m a server, so this happens to me often. Unfortunately I won’t risk the tip, so even if it feels gross, just smile.
i would literally just say
No
I would ignore it unless it was said in a way to be purposely condescending.
Well context is a little necessary. My code of conduct for life includes: when it is safe to do so, judge slowly.
I was in a little town in Georgia (USA) once where everyone called everyone by sweetie, darlin’, honey, or what have you. It would have been kind of ridiculous to be upset about a language convention in a place where they were just trying to make sure I was staying hydrated.
On the other hand, I have been called sweetie when I was acting as an advanced computer hardware repair, and so I then called him “kiddo.” He was like 50, and I was 29. Lol
Ok I know exactly what I would do, because this happened to me over a decade ago.
Some dude called me sweetie and I literally responded “Sweetie?” with a LOOK. We were both in an elevator and he lost his mind on me. I felt trapped. On the elevator ride up, He told me I should be grateful and then called me a C word TWICE.
I had to get back in the elevator to go back down and his friend apologized to me for his behavior. I went to down to my leasing office and turns out, he was a San Diego Padres baseball player known for being an absolute jerk.
I just act like they’re not talking to me lol. I ain’t sweetie, must be talking to someone else
I’m from the south. It will happen. It doesn’t bother me.
Call him sweetie back sarcastically
It depends on the tonality, but usually men who call me sweetie give off caring energy, so I usually just smile and it makes me feel taken care of. If it’s said creepy, my eyebrows get real weird lol
“Oh, actually my name is [my name]!” I say it nicely one time, and after that I continually repeat it until they say it correctly.
If I don’t want them to have my name, I say something like “Oh, Ms. is fine!”
Now, occasionally I do make an exception. I’m only really going to correct them if I catch a vibe of condescension, rudeness, etc. If it feels like this is just the way he talks then I’ll hold back.
I just hit them with “thanks, pumpkin” and keep walking 😭
Interestingly I found people in New England (more rural areas) might say “what can I get you, darlin’ “ and I didn’t find it at all creepy. But I am 60+ female. As long as they don’t leer, don’t sound like Quagmire (giggety) it felt innocent.
I don’t really mind as long as it’s not meant to be condescending and doesn’t go any further.
I don’t lol because ew
Ignore it. But here’s the thing, most of the time it’s sweet. So I like it. For example, is he old enough to be my father or Grandpa? Usually it’s a positive thing. Now, if the guy is being a douchebag, I typically ignore it but sometimes, it hits a nerve and I will act in a way that is either embarrassing to him or I act in a way that makes him think I pity him. He typically gets annoyed and walks away.
I wish i new how to answer, i just grumble internally. Although im in the uk so its normally darling, rather than sweetie.
I can usually tell intention by tone and body language. If it’s a power play or condescending, I say I’m not your sweety, if it’s someone older or someone who doesn’t mean it negatively, I usually smile and go with the warmth.
I’m a server and get it a lot. Normally just smile and go with it. Tips are my life lol
I don’t care enough to respond. I usually don’t even notice it.
“I’m generally more salty”
I don’t.
I’ve almost always had this come up at work, and it’s usually elderly men who are otherwise being respectful and soliciting my help or opinion about something. They don’t remember my name but remember me as a competent person who can be relied on. I ignore it or just say, “You know, I don’t know that we’ve ever introduced ourselves, I’m vizslalvr lastname.”
I’m almost 40 now and it happens less because they learned who I was and I’m too old for sweetie or whatever other diminutive bullshit they come up with. But 85% of them never sweetied me again, and those that did eventually got my name right.
For entire strangers in non-work situations, I just ignore them entirely. If a response is absolutely required, I respond and then call them something equally diminutive, Boomer, or Steve, depending on their age. Dunno why I settled on Steve, but they either get the point or correct me. If they correct me I say, “And I’m not a sweetie, what’s your point?”
Loudly: “sweetie? I don’t like pet names!” Then make serious eye contact with someone else and move away.
If it’s likely safe to do so, he’s getting a name back. Context of the moment will decide if it’s a gaudy ‘sweetheart’ or if it’s plain and profane. Swear like a sailor if I gotta.
If the vibes are off, suddenly it’s all hands on deck to make sure I’m in a public place with people or getting someone on the phone yesterday.
“Yes, snookums?”
nothing because i really don’t mind it
The same as women who think its cute to call everyone honey, sweetie, baby. I was born and raised in the south MS, TN, AL, i still dont like it.
I dont know you, dont call me that. Its not “cute”, it doesnt make me trust you, my love language isnt validation.
depends, if he looks like a good person it doesn’t bother me. but if he gives off strong creep vibes i just walk away.
Sugarbritches. Sweetlips. Boy.
I call him little buddy
Champ, cowboy, and buddy are my go-to retaliation pet names for men. Champ usually hits the hardest.
I say, “please don’t call me that”. I don’t GAF how that makes them feel about it.
“Don’t call me sweetie. I don’t know you. It’s creepy.”
I have a patient who has a “crush” on me. He has asked me out, of which I said no, I am married. He said, oh, unless you’re ok with that. I said no again. He now has coffee/lunch 4 – 5 days a week at the coffee shop across from my office and just watches. The other day I went over to grab a can of soft drink from the shop and he very over familiarly said, “Hello darling”, (after i said hello to a couple of people who were all my patients). I just stopped walking, put on a blank face and stared him directly in the eyes. I didn’t say anything and didn’t acknowledge his words, but staring at someone who pushes your boundaries right in the eyes with no emotions absolutely puts the comment back on them. It draws attention to the ludicrousness of what they have said, the inappropriateness of the words. Silence is so much more powerful. After about 2 – 3 seconds, I went about my business in the shop. No words, nothing. I haven’t seen him again after a year of his antics. It works every time. Silence, and hold your stare.