Hi, so lately, my GF and I have been through a rough patch. She’s insecure and has attachment issues, which has led to many MANY problems. Despite these problems, our sex life is still fantastic.

Today, I was studying for some exams, and then my GF hit me up and asked if I wanted to do a booty call as we did in the past. I said I didn’t feel like it today because I was busy, had already masturbated, and just wanted to chill and play video games. Despite this, she continued to try and convince me for 30-45 minutes. In those 30-45 minutes, she said stuff like:

“I’m confused. Why do you not want to do stuff \[have sex\] anymore?” (Blatantly false because we have sex A LOT, and it’s great for both of us. She often praises how good our sex life is compared to other couples.)

“You don’t wanna do stuff? :(”

“My ego just feels hurt.”

“But like damn, if you don’t wanna have sex with me that bad, it’s fine.”

“It’s chill. I don’t care anymore.” (she then proceeded to keep texting about the same thing)

After 15-20 minutes of this, I started to get annoyed and proceeded to tell her the same reasons I listed above almost verbatim. Though, she then began to send texts like this:

“I’m not nagging. I thought you were playing the game where I try to convince you and stuff.” (This “game” happened only once in the past, and it was situational. I told her I don’t like it in general.)

“Usually, I reject people and stuff, but it’s weird for you to reject me…” (She gets hit on a lot at the gym. I also seldom decline sex.)

Then, as I am typing typing this post, she texted:

“It’s like almost masochistic in a way. I feel like I always beg for your attention, and I shouldn’t have to.” (During this rough patch, she has constantly accused me of not loving or caring about her despite my best efforts to show that I do…)

She also texted just now:

“Life’s a big joke. Everyone wants me but you. But I already know. I know you’re gonna blame that it’s all in my head and what not, or that I’m just insecure (she is.) \[An\] insecure person would think nobody wants them; I already know that other people want me.”

“All I ever wanted was for you to be in love with me. I just wanted you to want me.” (???)

I love and care my girlfriend so much, but my God, this is just too much. Did she try to pressure me into having sex or am I just delusional?

TL;DR: Girlfriend said she wants to do a booty call today, I said I’m not in the mood and she got upset and started spamming me with emotionally driven texts.

1 comment
  1. It sounds like she did.. if she wants to have sex and you say no, the asking should immediately stop there. If it happens often, I would discuss it with her and just ask her up front why she pressured consent. Doesn’t mean you have to break up with her, y’know? Sometimes you just need to speak with each other to get the truth out.

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