Recently, my ex of two years reached out to me almost daily for a week telling me she was thinking about me and reminding me of good times during our relationship. Since we’ve never been on bad terms and it’d been a moment since we’d caught up, we had a nice chat about the other’s life.
After a few days, she sends some pics from before we broke up. I was the one who ended things with her and was a dick about the whole thing, so the kindness of her messages caught me off guard. I discovered she was recently single and not long after she invited me over. I ended up going and we watch a movie and make small talk before she asks me to stay the night.
Based on her body language, part of me thought she wanted sex but I was pretty nervous to make a move without clear consent and/or discussing where we stood with each other as it’d been almost two years since we’d last met. I also thought she might just be lonely due to her recent breakup, or she could just want to close our chapter, or anything other than sex.
I asked why she wanted me over and she hit me with the, “why did you come?”. After that, I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything for fear of doing wrong by her.
She asked me to stay with her in bed where neither of us made a move. I ended up leaving the next morning and she’s stopped reaching out since. I’m thinking I shoulda listened to my gut and stayed home. I’m pretty bad with these things and being intimate while not being intimate was something I didn’t think would affect me this much.
I think I’ll just go back to NC since that’s helped me so much before, but part of me feels that if she reaches out again I might make the same mistake.
Did she just want sex and how do I find true closure with this woman?
TL;DR: Ex gf I left years ago asked me to spend the night with her in her bed but didn’t make a move
1 comment
Maybe she took it as a rejection, which on top of her recent breakup, hurt her or shook her confidence. I would not invite a man to my house unless I wanted to hook up. If you don’t want to keep talking to her, don’t. I would at least drop her a message that says “I had a hard time reading your signals that night. I didn’t know if it was a good time to make a move and didn’t want to put you in a bad spot. I just wanted you to know it wasn’t you or anything you did”.