I (F26) met my bf(M29) 1 year ago and we’ve been together for 6months now. When we started talking I wanted FWB situationship but this evolved into official relationship.

At the start we spoke about social media and he stated not once that he isn’t active on instagram and I as well..

But my friend found his IG account (it’s private) and then I decided to create one but I didn’t follow him just wanted to see if his following on IG increases… and it does.. He’ll follow 2 people then they’d follow him back, if someone unfollowed him, he’d unfollow it back. Anyway as I said his account is private and I can’t see who he follows and unfollows. Also he don’t know that I know that he has IG account.
So basically I just see numbers changing and I kind of noticed a pattern that when he goes out usually after a day or two he follows new people and get’s more followers. Another thing I noticed is that he then spends more time online on whatsapp.

Anyway this seems shady as f*ck and I don’t know how to approach this situation.

TL;DR found secret instagram account of my bf and his IG activity seems shady.

4 comments
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  2. Honestly I’d most likely just bail because honesty is a necessity in any serious relationship for me. Without that what’s even the point in a serious committed relationship, unless it’s something more casual. But if you want to stick with him I’d suggest confronting him with the fact he does indeed have an Instagram and why he felt he had to lie about it. I’m 30m and I don’t have patience for that type of behavior from a significant other.

  3. Firstly, it seems like this is becoming a bit of an obsession for you.

    Secondly, why did you decide not to follow him? What were you trying ascertain by holding back from follow him and still checking up on him?

    I wouldn’t say his activity seems shady beyond him saying he isn’t active on instagram. Then again, by whose definition of active? Why was your friend looking in the first place or was it simply one of those suggested friends?

    Honestly, have a conversation with him. It’ll help.

  4. Playing devils advocate here. I have social media accounts. If somebody asked me if I was active, I would say no because I do not post consistently. I might post once a year. I do follow people and get notifications when they post. If I find it interesting, I’ll go and look and like the post.

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