25F. I’m very particular about my stuff. I’m just not a sharing is caring type of person. I like my things a certain way and I just don’t like people using or borrowing my stuff. For example, my friend needed to borrow some heels from me and I let her borrow it because she really needed them and I felt bad, but when she returned them to me, I got agitated. She had adjusted the straps and readjusting them got me feeling mildly annoyed.
Same with people using my car. I like my seat, wheel, and mirror to be positioned a certain way and when people use them, they adjust it and I don’t like dealing with that.
I keep my stuff for myself and use only my stuff. I never borrow or ask anyone else to use their stuff. I don’t even use my own mother’s things. If I don’t have mascara, and my mom does, I’ll actually go out of my way to buy my own pair rather than use my mom’s. I’m just really particular about my stuff, I don’t like using other people’s things and I don’t like them using mine.
My friend and I recently got into a fight about this and she says that I’m not a generous or giving person. She says that this trait is bad mannered and that this mentality is selfish. I personally don’t think I’m a selfish person, I just think I’m slightly ocd about how I like my stuff. But she doesn’t see that. What should I do?
2 comments
>My friend and I recently got into a fight about this and she says that I’m not a generous or giving person.
That doesn’t seem to be related to your OCD-ness.
i.e. If you’re a giving person, you do things for people, you give gifts etc. while you’re OCD about borrowing your stuff, then I think you’re a generous and giving person.
If you almost never give gifts, never treat people to anything, never do things for people, AND you’re OCD about borrowing your stuff, then I agree with your friend.
I’d say your friend has a point and you’re giving off only child vibes.