I very recently got diagnosed with autism and have no idea what that means for my romantic life now and how people see me.
Does being autistic change how someone looks at you?
Would it put you off if someone is autistic?
How do I approach telling someone I’m autistic?
My love live wasn’t great before my diagnosis so it’s going to be hard to judge going off my past on wether it gets worse because it can’t get much worse but I don’t care how blunt your answers are male or female would you date someone autistic? Would someone being autistic change how you view them?
Hope this makes sense dms are open if you wanna talk about it more
3 comments
Unfortunately being autistic WILL probably affect how some people see you. There are lots of stigmas around autism and a lot of people just kinda suck. The good news is anyone who has an issue with you being autistic isn’t worth your time anyway, so if you’re up front about it you won’t have to worry about wasting time with those people.
At least one of my current partners is autistic, possibly more (undiagnosed atm), and I’m at least neurodivergent although I don’t know exactly how since finding someone to diagnose me as an adult has been difficult. So I definitely wouldn’t be bothered by it, and in fact usually much prefer dating/interacting with other neurodivergent people. There are a lot more autistic and otherwise neurodivergent folks out there than you might think, and while you can absolutely successfully date a neurotypical person, I personally haven’t had a lot of great experiences doing so.
How you tell someone depends on the context. If you use dating apps you could always just put it on your profile to weed people out more quickly, but that obviously won’t work for meeting people in person. I think telling someone who doesn’t know yet on the first date, just causally and directly, will probably work ok. In my experience telling people sooner rather than later is helpful because then it opens up the option for you to talk about how that affects communication, expectations, etc going forward and can help them understand where you’re coming from a bit better.
Maybe it’s a gender thing but I haven’t really ever had issues in the dating world. I’m always upfront and have have had ignorant comments like “you seem normal to me”. I always explain about the whole spectrum being wide and that some people will have certain characteristics while others have different characteristics.
I don’t know how relatable these books are to someone on the spectrum or if you’ll ever read them but if you have time you can read one. They are romance books with people on the spectrum and they find a way to work on the relationship. The Rosie project, neanderthal seeks human, kiss Quotient. Then there’s beard science but he’s not on the spectrum, just has a personality that doesnt conform to the normal. If you end up reading them, tell me how it goes