Hi Everyone
I (22M) had been dating this girl(22F) for around 3-4 years and just a couple days ago she came and broke up with me. Context for this is we had been going really well for the first 3 or so years and then we had to do long distance this year which made it obviously hard of one another. There were several factors which I thought led to this including me feeling relationship anxiety due to the fact that she was quite far away and would be around a group of other 10-15 people of both men and women the same age as us. This caused me to say and do certain things like asking her for more affection , reassurance and wishing to see her more , question her loyalty and whatnot. This definitely went through the last 7/8 months however I kept telling her that I would work on it and I believe it did improve for a bit. Further to that there were other issues like me wanting to move states back to my family after my studies whilst her family was from the state we are in at the moment and she was ‘not in it enough’ to move. I talked about marriage earlier in the year and it scared her too. Just three days ago she came and visited me and told me she had lost feelings for me despite all our communication being quite normal. The other thing she mentioned was that I was the only person she had dated and she has no other experience which may mean that she has been talking to someone else? or she wants to date around and see. Just seeking some advice for whether I could contact her after a couple weeks and see if I can work from there. Whether i do no contact for a while. What are the chances this could work… i know for a fact that my anxiety stemmed from the long distance which we wouldn’t have to do after this year.
**TL;DR;** : GF lost feelings for me in the last 7 months after starting long distance.
2 comments
She’s not going to take you back. She is wanting to enjoy her twenties and date around and see how she feels. She’s not ready for a committed relationship.
Go no-contact until she contacts you, and when she does, try to be neutral and more mature in handling things. If she want to see you, go for it.. if she told you she regret her decision, told her that you open to the relationship but want to take things slowly (like on the first date)
Dont overreact right now, if she wants a breakup, give it to her and you will become respectfull for her and its her job to reach out to you, not yours, she broke up with you!
Mystery is key to attraction, so play it like you okay with breakup bc she thinks you will beg and pleade so her ego can goes sky-high but no, you remain calm and move on to find best version of yourself, and i bet she will contact you at some point if you will do no-contact and probably no social media for some time as well, or just some good moments you had, but never post a sad qoutes or things like this.