A mutual friend invited a group of us on vacation for her birthday and we’re midway through. I don’t want to ruin the vacation by blowing up at Aiden so I was hoping you guys could give me some advice on how to handle this…
The first time I met Samuel was during this vacation. I thought he was just being friendly since I’m pretty shy and reserved, but I realise now he was flirting with me. We spent a lot of time together and often if I didn’t feel up to doing something the rest of the group was doing, he would stay behind with me and we always sat together during meals or if we had to take transport anywhere.
Two days ago, he asked me if I wanted to go somewhere just the two of us for lunch but Aiden, who I’ve known my whole life, invited himself and three other people along. The entire time Aiden was being uncharacteristically standoffish and made sure Samuel wasn’t alone with me or sitting next to me ever. He was the one who told me Samuel was flirting with me.
The next day when I went to sit next to Samuel it was clear my company was unwanted. I had to push him to tell me what was wrong but he told me I should’ve told him Aiden was my boyfriend. I told him he wasn’t my boyfriend and he told me that Aiden thought differently. He said Aiden threatened him after the lunch fiasco and warned him to stay away from me. According to Samuel, Aiden said I was his which I don’t know if I believe.
I like Samuel, but only as a friend so I’m not upset he isn’t flirting with me anymore. However, I’m still angry at Aiden, especially if he did say I was his. I’ve been avoiding him, which has been hard and I’m worried I’m just going to explode any second. So, I need advice on how to confront him and if I should wait until our vacation is over.
TL;DR – My friend threatened a guy who was flirting with me and told him I was his while we’re all on vacation together for another friend’s birthday. I don’t know how to confront him without ruining the vacation or making things awkward for everybody.
4 comments
Well, it is obvious that your friend who made threats against the other like you. Speaking to him is better than confronting him. Just ask him what was that all about, listen to his justification as to why? Avoiding only escalate the tension between you and him, buy the way there is no such thing as male friends and female friends, lines do get crossed.
>I don’t know how to confront him without ruining the vacation or making things awkward for everybody.
Don’t you think what he did ruined the vacation?
Is there more to this story?
> My friend threatened a guy
Yeah, that’s not ok. Call him out on it.
Why did you allow Aiden along for the date with Samuel? I bet as you are bad with standing up for yourself and making clear boundaries with people. Aiden knew this and he knew you could not say ‘no’ so he came along to intimidate Samuel. Samuel likes you and he is imposing his will on the situation because he knows you will not stand up for yourself.
You will not be ruining the vacation, Aiden-baby already did this. Once again you are worried what other people think, even when they have done you a ‘bad’. Put Aiden-baden in his place.