I like a guy for 1 year. I met him on my vacations last year. I spent the most romantic moments of my life with him such as kissing at the beach under the moonlight, cuddling the whole night, he made me breakfast and gave me a teddy bear. It was a magical vacation romance. It felt so intense but we never had sex because I’m saving myself and he knows that I’m a virgin.
He doesn’t want anything serious because he will leave the country, hooks up with many girls (I didn’t know this when we met) and he wants to marry with a girl from his culture (he’s South Asian). It hurts me. I tried to forget him with cutting contact and trying to date other people but I can’t stop thinking about him. It’s been one year and I think about him everyday.
We had some misunderstandings between us because of some mutual friends but he always watched my social media and reacted to my posts, likespamming my pictures etc even though we were in no contact but since February we started talking again and he wants to see me. He’s always asking when I come back to town, my heart feels very happy but at the same time I feel overwhelmed and disappointed because I know he will never fall in love with me and we might stop talking again.
How can I control my feelings? I don’t understand why I can’t stop feeling so attached to him. I broke up with my ex boyfriend in December and I moved on within 3 months but I can’t move on from a vacation romance.