So where do I start. I met a girl 1 and a half years ago and we instantly became really close. It was probably the wrong time I guess but she was in a situationship style relationship. We became best friends real fast but I started developing feeling for her. It was the first person that I actually felt happy with and enjoyed spending time with. I was always inside my house not wanting to do anything with my life in all my teen years and she basically taught me how to live. Not knowingly but I actually wanted to go outside and do things young people do just because she was there. I couldn't do anything to pursue a relationship because 1. She had the other guy which she was actually in love with even though they were not together and 2. She saw and sees me as a best friend. However after some months of knowing her I started seeing some signs(which might just be me misjudging and being delusional) of her liking me or at least having an interest. Whenever she was drunk she would tell my I'm pretty and almost seem like she was trying to kiss me . I couldn't take that as an immediate yes though because apart from the times of her being drunk she didn't really do much apart from the fact that she is a physical person even with friends and would hug me and do things like that. Then we became roomates when I went to college and she went to and we were at the same house for 3 months. Then we separated because of some things that happened but we still stayed how we were and even closer. The thing is that we have slept in the same bed numerous times cuddling. We would be holding hands for no reason and things like that. But I couldn't make a move for some reasons. 1. I love spending time with her and having her as my best friend so I don't want to risk that. I don't want to risk our friendship. It hurts a lot to keep it in me but I think it would hurt more losing what we have already built. 2. She talks to me about other guys and how much she loved the situations hip guy she was with. Even if she has interest in me how does she expect me to make a move when she is constantly talking about other guys. And the worst part of all is that since she was the one that taught me how to live and showed me true happiness I can't imagine my life without her in it. I also can't imagine myself being with another girl. She is beautiful in every way in my heart. I really don't know what to do. I have been thinking about talking to her about it and telling her how much I value our friendship but what if it makes things awkward and she pulls away from me. It might work but might not. And I'm really scared to do.or not to.do.anything. I don't know what advice you can give but anything is appreciated.