I've had a few friends (and a boyfriend in the past) who constantly go out their way to do me favors or become very generous with me. They never turn me down or say no. I've come to realize that they are people pleasing and often they explode at me when I call out a specific disrespectful behavior from them once or twice.
They accuse me of not doing much for them as they do for me. Or how they feel like they're carrying the friendship. That they always go out of their way for me. That anytime I bring up a negative action they did, that I am just calling them a "sh*tty friend".
And all I know is that they definitely have people pleasing tendencies and want to be liked by everyone. I get confused because not all of my friends are like this. And I totally show appreciation and will be grateful for the things they do for me. I even give them little gifts or offer to pay for meals. I've offered to help and be an ear for them (which they usually turn down).
So I am confused. I've asked them what I can do to ease their plate, but they never give me an answer. So I feel like I am doing something wrong. I don't even get upset or anything when another friend turns me down or says no, or even gives me some boundaries to respect.
What can I be doing wrong? Are these type of friends just not compatible? How can I help a people pleaser or two in my life? I still like them for other things that have nothing to do with their generosity or willingness to help.