It's frustrating when I'm left alone with a person who I'm not close with because I get quiet and I come off as extremely awkward and like I don't want to talk. I just don't know what to say. Maybe it's anxiety. It probably is. Whenever I find myself in such a situation, the feeling of dread washes over me, and I feel the need to get up and leave the room as fast as possible. It's as if I can't stand a second more sitting in silence that is almost entirely contributed by me because no worthwhile thoughts pop into my head… I put myself in an involuntary state of panic over nothing. I either stay and go non-verbal, essentially freezing in place while only keeping my attention on my phone, or I try to talk through the overwhelm. And if I do leave, It eats me up even more. Especially if I leave abruptly…
Eye contact is also another thing that bothers me a lot when I talk to others. I feel awkward if I stare too much, but I also feel awkward when I don't look people in the eyes. But then, looking away doesn't seem polite at all. I don't know how long I should look at someone, and I don't know when it's okay not to look at someone. I feel like I'm going crazy because conversating is supposed to be natural. I've always been shy as a kid, but never to the extent where I couldn't talk with others. Does anyone know what I can do about this? What could be the cause of this happening?