Throughout school and university, I’ve made a lot of campus acquaintances where we meet once, get along well, but it doesn’t blossom into a close and highly involved friendship after that one meeting. It still feels like I’m inviting people to do things (with varied levels of success) much more than I’m being invited to do things. At the same time, I’ll watch people do all these fun things that I wish I could do, sometimes I’ll drop a hint when people talk about what they’ve done (say like “oh, that sounds so fun, I’d love to do something like that someday”).
I want to become the kind of person that people get along with upon meeting and want to hang out again with, or the person that gets invited to join an existing friend group (I’ve never been like that historically). What are the qualities that make people want to invite you into their lives, not just go along with you when you ask. Because for most of my life, my criteria for a close friend is anyone is willing and committed enough to say yes to my plans and invitations. But most people are more picky than me, how do I become someone that gets picked?