(39F) have lived with my partner of 2 years (33M) for about a I year now. I hadn't met his mother (51F) but I know they have had a strained relationship and hadn't seen each other in years. About a month ago he said she would be coming to visit for a week. A week seemed long to me, and I work from home while he's at the office about 11 hours a day day so I was a bit concerned, but he assured me she planned on Door Dashing in our neighborhood during the day to make extra money.
So, she gets here. She's a little wacky (believes lots of mostly harmless conspiracies….faked moon landing, stuff like that, and is obsessed with TikTok) but fine. However….she doesn't Door Dash or leave my house at all for the first week. At the end of the week she confesses to my boyfriend that she has no job and no place to live. (When asked why she doesn't try to get a job she cries and says "No one will hire someone over 50!") She says she has friends (from TikTok lol) that she can stay with, but she doesn't know when. I'm feeling frustrated by this, as my daily routine is disrupted and her stuff is all over my kitchen kitchen, living room, dining room. He's at work all day, so it affects him less.
It's now been 3 weeks with no end in sight. I'm feeling very frazzled and I understand my partner is in a weird position (does he kick out his homeless mom? that seems cruel.) We have been paying for all her meals this entire time and giving up a large chunk of our small home (which is also my workspace.) It's expensive and disruptive and rude and unfair. My parents have told me I can stay with them, but that is still a massive disruption to my life. I just want my space and my life back…though I don't want to be cruel and I know family stuff is delicate.
What would you guys do?
TLDR: Partner's mom's visit turned into extended stay and it's disruptive to my life.