I graduated high school in 2011 and started college the following year. About three years in, my dad became physically unable to work due to health issues and went on disability. My parents have always been hardworking people, especially since we immigrated from Cuba in 2001. We’ve had our ups and downs, but we always managed.
After my dad’s income became limited, I had to step up. I started working full-time while also helping manage his medical needs and appointments. I didn’t officially drop out of college, but I stopped attending and never finished. Between working 40+ hours a week and taking care of my dad, there just wasn’t time.
In 2018, my mom had a mild stroke that affected her speech and right arm. She eventually also went on disability, though thankfully she’s recovered a lot since then. From that point on, I’ve been taking care of both of my parents while continuing to work full time.
We recently moved into a new apartment that better fits our financial situation. But my dad often makes comments about how much he hates it here and how everything is terrible. It’s hard because he doesn’t seem to notice how stressed I am or how much it affects me mentally. He compares our situation to other family members who are doing better, and I don’t know if there’s some resentment there.
I’ve tried talking to him and explaining that this is temporary. That helps for a little while, but eventually the comments come back.
He was diagnosed with lung cancer last October, and we’ve been dealing with that as well. I know that’s a big part of what he’s going through, but it’s still hard.
Lately, I just feel like nothing I do is enough, even though I’m doing everything I can to make their lives easier and less painful.
On top of that, I’ve noticed it’s starting to affect me in other ways. Gaming has always been my main way to disconnect, but I find myself doing it less and less now. And when I do play with friends, I feel like I’m on a really short fuse and get irritated more easily, even with people I care about. That’s not who I want to be, but I feel constantly on edge.
I don’t even know exactly what I’m looking for by posting this. I think I just needed to get it off my chest. But if anyone has been in a similar situation or has advice on how to cope with this kind of burnout, I’d really appreciate it.