If your single/ have never been in a relationship/ never have been "loved"
I just want to tell you… Its ok. I have been down this road and your not alone. I have been single my entire life & as a matter of fact and still a virgin. (29M) Look it might not feel like it but its not the end of the world. And im finally in a place where being single and being a virgin dosen't bother me anymore.
I use to tie up my all my worth and value on finding a relationship and guess what. it got me not a single women/ not a single date/ and absolutely no value. So I just want to emphasize this because I see a lot of people talk about dating woes and how they are miserable and I want you to just spread some positivity and share what helped me get through tough times and made me realize that being single is totally ok
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You as an individual have value and are a unique and wonderful person. You do not need validation from a partner and your value is not tied to how many people you have dated/ fucked/ been with.
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Societies standards are arbitrary; I am a child of immigrants and in the culture the most important thing is being married and having kids…. Guess what? That has lead to me seeing many people being absolutely fucking miserable, because they though that getting married and having kids was going to solve their issues. It didn't and we all from an early age were told "To live a happy life you need someone in it" This is NOT true. Fuck societies standards if you want to live by yourself in your own solace you are free to and as a matter of fact people will judge you regardless. fuck them!
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Reframe your mind about being single – Think about it. This is a golden opportunity for you to find what hobbies you enjoy, go out to that movie you wanted to see, play that video game you wanted to play. Binge that show! Go out and enjoy life! I use to be so fucking miserable because I would be like "I have no one to go out on a walk with" and then I thought to myself Why the fuck dont I just do this myself?? Also this will help you become a more well rounded person and you have more options and activities to challenge yourself with.
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This is just for guys but.. STOP BLAMING WOMEN – It irritates the shit out of me when I see guys misguide their anger at women and blame them for being single. Look dating is hard as fuck it always has been and always will be but please, its not a women's fault that you are single, as a matter of fact it might not be your fault either like I said dating is hard as fuck I wish we stopped blaming each other and realized "Shit im going through the same struggle as you!" I think showing this compassion and taking accountability for yourself you will get out of this headspace of blame and realize that like much of life nothing is easy and thats ok! Thats the beauty of dating its like going on a scavenger hunt to find something.
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Lean on your friendships and your family; I have so many videos talk about how we undervalue friendships and you know what this is so true. I know that friendships and relationships are very different but I think having solid friends you can rely on and talk to can go a long way in making you feel less lonely. Its the same with family I have been spending so much more time with the people I care about and it made me appreciate them more and made me appreciate myself more too.
I just want to emphasize this; This really helped me, you might read all this and think its all a bunch of BS. However I just wanted to share my experience with you all. Look a lot of us are dealing with loneliness, sadness, rejection. You are not alone, but dont let it defeat you and I also dont want to give some BS like "You will find someone" I actually dont know if you will Hell… I might die single BUT here is the key thing its ok. I looked at all my old posts about being rejected by a co-worker from a year ago and cringe hard lol, but Im so proud of how far I have come in a year and if my post helps someone else and makes them feel better than its really a win.
Go out there and kick ass y'all!