As the title asks, how do you manage that time of month with your significant other? I think that everything is fine then she hits me with the total change in mood. Its usually a downer but im trying to figure out how best to be supportive and navigate around this sensitive time regarding emotions.
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Be very careful with your words. Try to be understanding that it’s hard for her to control. Don’t turn stuff into a fight.
>she hits me with the total change in mood
She doesn’t choose to do this. If someone is sick or exhausted or in pain you treat them with a little bit more care and compassion right? This is kind of the same thing except it happens on a more predictable schedule than the common cold.
Empathy, love and chocolate.
Same way you handle a boss fight—prepare, stay calm, don’t say anything stupid
Keep your bullshit to yourself and be as helpful as you can without being asked.
Like a grown up.
**communication and patience honestly ask her what she needs and don’t take things personally small support goes a long way**
My wife doesn’t really get moody ig but she does get really really bad cramps so I just get her some
This is what my flat was originally for. The kids tend to keep me a little closer nowadays. So it’s the bottom of the garden for 3/4 days. No smirks. No smart comments. Even facts need to be softened / a slight misting before them laying prevents cracks appearing.
When she’s down give her reassurance and affection.
When she gets angry, let her get it out. Then hold her in your arms.
When she starts to cry, stroke her and hold her hands and offer her comforting words and hold her hands. Get the timing right and read her right. Crack a non sexist, relatable joke. The moral light hearted but badly put the better. Never fails to be a goof to make her smile or better yet laugh.
What makes your SO happy when she is sad? Doing little things that strengthen your bond and show you know her and care about her goes a long way. Order her favorite takeout and rent a movie she’d like. Buy her flowers and chocolates. Buy her good smelling bath soaps and draw her a bath (you can even get one of those boards you put over the tub and bring her something to eat or read or whatever in there). While she’s in the bath do some of her chores she’s struggling with because she feels down. You don’t have to do all those things at once- pace yourself. The best move is to notice how she struggles and then help her out without her asking for help. Change it up a little each time so it still feels like a gift and not a routine/expectation. Generally women don’t want to go out at this time of month so indoor stuff is good.
When the event itself hits, prep something on the TV and a hot water bottle. Applying heat to the uterus helps a LOT with cramps. Sexy fun time can help too if you’re both into that because it causes uterine contractions that push the blood out faster. Just be prepared. Hot water bottles will do that too- the increase in blood but shorter bleed time is common. Chocolates actually make women feel better because of the compounds in them. Dark chocolate has more of those compounds if she likes dark.
Look at charts of how men’s & women’s hormones fluctuate throughout the month and you’ll understand why she gets such extreme mood shifys and why these things aren’t controllable.
I live with my best friend and we developed a system. When her mood is flipping and she’s being rude I’ll say “go to your room” not actually sending here there obviously but it’s become like a trigger that makes her snap to what she’s doing. She’ll say sorry and stop for a while but like it’s been said she can’t really help it. I don’t get mad about it I just laugh it off (Internally… Do NOT laugh out loud) until she goes a little too far and boom. Go to your room.
It’s not up to me to handle anything. I treat her the same way all the time – with love and respect – and I expect the same from her regardless of where she is in her cycle.
Be nice, understanding, pick your battles, and find out if there are things that help. Men have mood swings that our partners have to deal with but they don’t get the privilege of it predictably happening around the same time each month.
Mark your calendar so it doesn’t blindiside you.
Then be nice to her. Ideally she’d also recognize that it’s her having issues, not the world going crazy around her, but if you’re calm and nice, it’s a great start.