So i'm like super introvert and awkward also have trust issues due to past incident. Anyways, i observe a lot, i tend to act mostly the same towards everyone but i see that people act different to each person which makes me think, maybe i'm the minority, i feel like it's too tiring to act different to certain people, it's so tiring. Any advice for this? Should i just stay like this or also adapt? (Yes i have bad social skills.. trying to improve for my own sanity)
3 comments
Your nature seems to burden your mind by taking too many factors into account in your interactions.
Allow yourself to make mistakes, take some social-risks and be a bit carefree. It may go poorly a few times. Initially even a lot. Over time, you can well find your rhythm, and your natural instinct take over – which is when it will not feel tiresome. You need to go over the risk-hurdle for that.
It’s tiring when you’re over-analysing every interaction for every little thing. It isn’t tiring when you’re yourself and let things happen according to your nature and feelings.
Introverts overanalyse their situations and this is why this thing called a “social battery” is created. Social battery isn’t a real term.
What it means really is that your mind is supressing your real feelings of yourself in social situations because you’re trying to please the people you’re with. Because of this forced pleasing and adhereance to the social standards, your mental energy is drained.
Mental supression is insanely costly on your mental energy. This is why introverts get drained from talking to people.
Don’t adapt to anyone. Be yourself. Don’t follow any social norms.
When you start following how you actually feel, not how you think you should act, eventually you’ll end up feeling normal and safe in social situations and interactions with other people, making you more extroverted.
I do the same. I act the same way towards everyone and I just accept that it will lose me friends sometimes. Some people like it when you’re direct and say stuff like “hey you’re fat, you should lose weight”, some people don’t like that.
I’m always direct and that cost me a lot of friends but you know what? I accept that as the cost of acting the same way towards every person.