I am autistic which I am very upfront about in getting to know someone.
I have been seeing a guy since November.
On our first movie date, I was stimming occasionally during the movie. (For me that looks like wiggling my fingers behind my head)
It’s not something I think about, it happens for a lot of reasons- excitement, noise, a strong emotion, etc.
He told me to stop that. I tried to educate him about what stimming is and how it happens sometimes without much thought.
He told me not to do it on two more occasions when we were hanging out at home, so I continued to try to educate him about it.
Tonight, we were out to eat and it happened quickly, maybe 5 seconds. He said “don’t do that.”
I told him that I no longer wanted to continue dating because I am exhausted of trying to educate him about stimming and I do not want to be told to “stop” or “don’t do that” every time it happens like I have done something wrong.
I feel bad but I am proud of myself for standing up for me in a way that I wouldn’t have when I was younger.