Together for 2 years now
I have been friends with a girl called F/31 for 10+ years now. We've never been close as such just did our highschool together and hung out together in a group. There has been absolutely no history between us. After highschool both went out ways and never kept in touch except for usual social media
Fast fwd to 2023 when I moved to Seattle where she also moved couple of years back. We started meeting each other and both had the same issue of making new friends in Seattle. She managed to form a consistent set of friends who even I am friends with now.
2024 I met my girlfriend and i thought my gf and my friend would hit off. I was looking forward to being bitched about by my friend and girlfriend but unfortunately it turned out my GF hates her.
I used to meet my friend randomly for dinner or coffee and chit chat about common people we knew. There is a bagel place where you have to stand in queue to get stuff. The queue is usually 45-1hr long. So if I go I'll usually get for my friends and colleagues as well. I never hid anything from my girlfriend. I used to casually let her know I went to dinner with her.
Problem started here : They tried to meet when I was not in town but then it didn't work out. When I came back my gf planned an evening with 3 of us. Unfortunately it was some sort of a theatre she had planned and now since my gf likes aisle seat she chose to sit at the very end followed by me and then my friend. This is where everything went wrong
My side : Everyone were settling down, my friend said something to me. Since it was a theatre she whispered something which I couldn't hear properly so I leaned a bit towards her to listen. This pissed off my gf big time. Towards then end since the show was in Tacoma and we drove there separately me in my car and my gf in hers. My friend decided to ride back with me to Seattle instead of my gf.
Her side : She felt invisible in the group of 3. She felt my friend was flirting with me or intentionally doing this to make her feel worthless. I was way too close to her giggling and talking. Not something someone would do. Riding back as well it was uncool of her to ride back with me. It made her feel even more insivible that night.
This lead to a huge fight between me and my gf. She, I think let my friend know as well that it wasn't the way you behave with someones boyfriend.
This fight has been going on for a year now. She doesn't want me to meet her at all. I agreed to that. I've never hung out with her, just her; neither have gotten any bagel for her anymore. Infact if I do go to that place I end up getting those bagels for my gf and her family.
But problem is we have a friend circle now so I tend to go to group events when invited. My girlfriend doesn't even like that. Since I moved to Seattle these are the only friends I've been able to make thanks to my original friend.
I've never been in such a situation and I am not sure how to handle this anymore. Advice please?