So, a few days back, one of my close friends told me that when she first saw me, she was scared to talk to me. She said that she was even glad that I took the initiative to start the conversation with her and her bench partner or else we wouldn't have become such close friends and I found it odd. I asked her specifically why did she think so but all she answered was- idk, you just looked like someone who would be very mean. This got me thinking because this is not first time I've been told by someone I'm pretty good friends with that at the start, they thought I would be mean but were surprised at how nice I actually am. So I asked one of my bestfriends, why would that be and she said that I have a tendency to make people speechless even when I think I'm speaking very normally. I also don't think its because what I say is dumb or annoying because I've been told by many people that they like to listen on my opinion and perspective (like sorta for advice and what would i do type of thing).
It bugs me a lot. Because I'm always showing interest in people I meet and not in a personal way, I also always encourage them to be honest and not hesitate if something I'm doing bugs them and I'm always smiling and joking. I can be very chaotic so I'm definitely not being all serious and monotone but when people still get a bad impression of me- I don't know what I'm doing wrong. And when I ask them, I always get vague answers like- idk I just felt like it or its your vibe.
I'm also not really physically scary as I'm just a 5'2, petite 17year old girl. Worse part is, its not even girls but even some of guy friends have told me that they found me intimidating! But I don't like the fact that I'm seen as unapproachable. What am I doing wrong?