Trigger warning: abortion, domestic violence.
Posting it here as well because I’m honestly desperate and trying to understand how to handle this.
I (31F) had a huge falling out with my best friend (32F) of 16 years.
For context, I have been in a relationship with a guy, let’s call him Tim (27M), for about six months. It’s nothing serious, just casual. Last month I found out I was pregnant, and Tim and I discussed it and decided we didn’t want to keep it. I was very distraught, emotional, and disturbed over it, but my best friend supported me through the whole thing even though we live miles apart.
Tim and I started the process to terminate and went to a very nice hospital. We decided to split the bill 50-50.
At first the process looked easy with just medication, but it wasn’t. My body couldn’t handle it and I ended up in the hospital after fainting and hitting my head on a table. Tim was constantly beside me, taking care of me, feeding me, and paying the bills for the time being.
The medication failed and I was told I needed surgery because my life was still at risk. It was a huge blow for me as it meant more money, and I started crying. Tim assured me he was ready to foot the entire bill and told me not to worry as we’re in this together, but I declined because it didn’t feel fair. After some discussion, we again decided to split it equally as Tim has responsibility for his disabled brother and his parents. I never wanted to take advantage of him.
From the hospital I called my best friend and told her the entire situation. I thought she would be worried about me, but instead she called me a doormat for paying half the bill and said nobody is going to give me a Nobel Prize for it.
I was already in a lot of pain and emotional, and that hurt me. In anger, I said at least I’m not a doormat like her, who even after constantly getting beaten by her own brothers at home and being called names, still showers them with gifts, love, and money.
She told me I shouldn’t have brought her family into the argument and to never ever call her again, then cut the call.
Now that I am recovering and out of the hospital, I tried calling and messaging her but she isn’t responding.
If someone says never contact them again after an argument like this, what is the right way to handle it without making things worse? Is this friendship even salvageable?