hello, this is going to be my first ever post on reddit. anyway, i ( 21F ) am in a relationship with a guy ( 30M ). we're both from assam. but we're in a long distance relationship.so he's jobless as he's an aspirant, preparing for APSC. so last year on April we started dating and his bday was on june. he came here for his bday and we celebrated. i bought cake, bouquet, handmade gifts, etc. then my bday was on dec. he said he had planned everything but couldn't come due to shortage of money. he gifted me ₹100. ok fine. then for christmas he wanted to contribute to my Christmas tree. he wanted to pay for the lights. he sent me ₹100. but unfortunately i used it on some other stuff. i bought a diet coke and chips. so after reaching home i asked him for some more money for the light. he refused to pay. said he didn't have anymore money. i asked him 100 and he gave me 40. fine. and he always exhausts his mb so eventually when we VDO call in the evening, there's no internet so he asks me to top up for him. i do. so once i exhausted my mb and asked him for ₹30. only ₹30. and nope, he didn't have any money. anyway fast forward to this year, 2026, he bought some books on January. it cost him around ₹1700. so eventually i asked him " you have money to buy books but not for me , you never give me anything ".he said it hurt him. next, this february. we're going to have a music festival around the last week of feb. i wanna go there so i Booked 2 tickets for us. he said he'll pay when he comes here. so now he's trying to gather some money to come here and stuff. now valentine's day is coming as well so i asked him if he has planned anything. he got furious and called me behen ki lodi. said i never understand him and his situation. he is struggling with money and im asking him whats his plan for valentine's day. am i the AH?
TL;DR:
I (21F) have been financially supporting small things in my LDR with my unemployed boyfriend (30M) who’s preparing for APSC. He rarely spends money on me, even small amounts, but bought books worth ₹1700. When I asked if he had any Valentine’s Day plans, he got angry and verbally abused me. am i asking for too much or something?