I (18F) have been dating my boyfriend (20M) for about 4–5 months. He’s genuinely a good guy loyal, kind, emotionally supportive, pays for dates, and treats me really well. On paper, he’s “husband material.”
The issue is I don’t feel that spark or deep longing. I don’t miss him badly or crave him, even though he hasn’t done anything wrong. I feel unfulfilled and sometimes even guilty because he’s clearly very into me.
I’m also a very independent person. I’ve handled things on my own my whole life and never really depended on a man — not even my own father. I don’t feel like I need a man for money, stability, or direction. It’s nice that he pays for dates, but I’m a go-getter and don’t rely on that. Because of that, I sometimes wonder what role I even want a partner to play in my life right now.
We’re also in different stages. I want to focus on school, building a future, traveling, and eventually leaving my state. He’s more settled and already wants me to meet his parents, which feels too serious for where I’m at.
I care about him and don’t want to lead him on, but I’m scared of regretting leaving someone who’s kind and loyal.