about 3 months into me and my boyfriends relationship we started being sexually active, and we are each other’s firsts for everything. i have made him orgasm from hand jobs, blow jobs, and a mix of the two, along with edging and road head…and he has never made me orgasm. first off, it was about 2 months of only me pleasuring him (my pants never came off), and when he finally tried fingering me, i got too scared that i was going to piss myself and i told him i couldn’t orgasm (that day). unbeknownst to me, until a few weeks ago, he took that as me saying i couldn’t orgasm PERIOD. i told him no and that i can orgasm solo, multiple times in a row even…and after that, sex has still just been him finishing and then us being done.
whenever he tries fingering me it lasts no longer than 15 minutes (on a good day), and he always wants to stop because his arm hurts, and even if i tried telling him to keep going, it would completely stop me from being able to orgasm, knowing that he didn’t want to be doing it anymore. there was one time that i gave him a hand job before sex, and he was able to last longer and truly pleasure me the way i wanted, but i still didn’t finish that time.
i feel like at this point, if i try to get him to focus on me, i’m going to feel bad for asking…i know he won’t be mean about it (he’s very sweet and loving), but i don’t know what to do anymore, it has made me really sad and i’m starting to worry that maybe he’ll never be able to make me orgasm…i know he’s open to trying new things because he’s generally agreed to and embraced everything i’ve told him i like, but i feel greedy for asking him to do things for me in bed. i don’t know if i should make him read and article or what lmao, and i feel like giving him direct instructions is just a turn off. so…is this just my life now? or does anyone have advice to help me 🙁