Gonna try to make it quick. Been with my girlfriend since high school on and off. After we broke up the first time, I was with other women and she was with someone. When we started talking again we said that we wanted to start dating again soon so we’d tie up the loose ends. She admitted to me that when she went to breakup with said person she gave them a blowjob.
I won’t lie, when I went to tie up loose ends after that I had sex as well. It’s been like 5 years since that and we’ve had issues but overall have been great and I can see the wife in her. That being said, I asked too many questions and I think about that often and I feel like such a hypocrite. We lost our virginity to eachother and I feel like I have some sort of innocence attachment and that adds to this feeling. I want a future with her. I don’t think she cheated on me, however I do feel slightly betrayed.
I’ve been doing better but still have moments of intense anger and sadness. She’s moving in soon and I’m just trying to put it behind me. She told me she was going to break up with him and ended up doing that. Also when i originally asked her about her partners she lied but came clean so it was the lie then saying she’d end it, then the bj which sucks but again we weren’t dating at the time. Been 5 years and never any issues with anyone else since.
Anyone been through something similar and have some advice on how to move on? Thank you.
EDIT: Jesus people. You know the whole reason I made this post is because I KNOW I AM WRONG. I am looking for advice to fix myself not my girlfriend. Is everyone with an issue in their relationship perfect? I called myself a hypocrite I don’t need all the name calling lol. I want to know how I can fix my way of thinking other than just “get over it” IM TRYING. There’s nothing you people can say I haven’t said to myself, so please either share your experience of how you overcame something similar or just keep your rude comments to yourself, thank you.