I’m 30F and my husband is 56M. We’ve been married for 3 years and together for 6 years.
Recently I heard my husband say this word for word while talking to himself:
“Could I live without her? Yes — I don’t want to, but yes.
Could I live without money? No.”
I wasn’t devastated, just unsettled. I also realize that part of what has always attracted me to him is that he can provide stability and structure to some extent, so I understand why money matters to him ..it matters to me too.
I’m trying to understand whether this mindset is normal in emotionally healthy, respectful, peaceful, and loyal relationships, or whether it reflects more of a survival-mode way of thinking rather than deep attachment.
For context, we’ve had significant financial and immigration stress over the years.
I’m not looking to bash him or to leave .. I just want perspective from people in long-term healthy marriages.