Hey everyone, looking for some outside perspective.
I’m 24M, and I’ve been talking to a 24F for about 1.5 months. We connected over shared interests (anime/art), and the conversations have felt genuine such as long replies, mutual interest, and not just surface-level small talk.
I asked her out once, but she couldn’t because she’s currently in a very demanding phase of work and doesn’t have much time or energy. It didn’t feel like a hard rejection as she explained her situation clearly, and we’ve stayed in touch since.
We still message, just more slowly now because she’s busy and often drained from work. Meeting up doesn’t seem realistic in the near term, so I’ve been trying to respect her situation and not push or pressure her.
Where I’m struggling is the ambiguity.
I’m not sure if I’m handling this in a healthy, patient way or if I’m slowly putting myself in a grey area that may never progress.
I don’t want to:
- rush her or add pressure when she’s already overwhelmed
- but I also don’t want to stay indefinitely in something that isn’t actually moving forward
I’d really appreciate advice on:
- How do you tell when patience is reasonable vs emotionally draining?
- Can attraction realistically hold when momentum is slow for an extended period?
- What does a healthy next step look like in a situation like this?
- Is there a way to maintain connection without pressure, or is clarity better at this point?
I’m not trying to force anything, just trying to be fair to both of us and avoid quietly burning out.
Thanks in advance to anyone willing to share their experience 🙂