We have two children, an almost 3 year old and a 5 month old.
Our eldest has always had low sleep needs. For the past 9 months, getting him to sleep (naps and nights) has been very difficult. We tried cutting naps. Daycare puts all children down at 12:30pm, which doesn’t work for him. He skips naps and is exhausted by evening.
If he does nap, even briefly, it removes his sleep pressure and he won’t fall asleep until 10-11pm. My husband doesn’t accept this. He insists on capping naps at 90 minutes, which I’ve explained repeatedly doesn’t help. Our son takes a long time to wake, is very irritable, and still doesn’t sleep earlier at night. Letting him finish his sleep cycle works better.
My husband won’t listen to me about wake windows or bedtime timing. He tries to put our son to sleep at random times and gets angry when it doesn’t work. For example, he drove around for 30 minutes this morning trying to make him nap. Unsurprisingly, our son didn’t sleep. When I delayed nap time slightly, he fell asleep easily. As a result, I’ve been left solo for bedtime tonight with both kids because he has "shit to do".
He also expects me to feed the baby on demand for his convenience. I’m exclusively breastfeeding; the baby often just needs a quick drink, especially in summer. I can’t force feeds to suit his schedule.
He'll randomly attempt dinner an hour early and gets angry when our son isn’t hungry. His frustration is taken out on me.
I’m exhausted by having the same arguments repeatedly and want an equal parenting partner who understands that our children are human beings, not robots. His attitude towards me extends far beyond parenting. He listens to internet strangers and ChatGPT more than me.
If he wanted a yes woman, why marry an educated person with thoughts and opinions and capability to research? Why feel the need to micromanage everything? Internet strangers, please knock some sense into him 😭