I have been going in circles with myself with my spouse, therapist and family members but I cannot shake these feelings and would love some different perspectives. We have been together for about 9 years and just got married last November. My wife and I go to raves every couple of months which does include doing party favors specifically MDMA. This in turn has had us expanding our adventures with some close friends of mine and in turn a specific friend who has been pretty closed off for the most part really opened up to my wife and have become "best friends". Now ill admit I am a little insecure and skeptical when it comes to male and female friendships outside of romantic ones but I recognize that and tend to always just remind myself its normal. Although at these events where people are more touchy feely and hugging I find myself feeling like second place. She tends to not be as open to me or intimate and will show it more to my other male friends. This in turn gets me in my head which I have expressed but have been told I just need to open myself up more. These events usually end up with me wanting to go out and dance while my wife tends to hang back with my other friend and sometimes usually has me sticking by her out of fear for not spending it with her or the chance that she would rather be with my friend. I have even tried to open myself up to my friend a bit more in a way to build a sort of trust and understanding but it doesnt seem to go anywhere outside of us hanging out at raves. Would love some insight of anyone who has had similar situations and or how to manage this and hopefully overcome it.
Tldr; Constantly feeling like I am being put in second place whenever we hang out with a long term friend of mine who has become "best friends" with my wife.