I'm 31M my partner is 30F. We've been together for 2.5 years.
Sometimes I wish I didn't exist. Then id have no troubles. I apologize for the choppy nature of this post.
I used to work from home full time (that was until my wife got me fired by repeatedly disturbing me and not allowing me to do my job, I had a lot of pressure on me from all directions and ended up being made "redundant"). (My wife would repeatedly say she's overwhelmed, not do her bit around the house and in life, ask me to go out during work hours etc. I blame her for losing my job)
She doesn't work. She says she wants to, but she never will get a job cause she doesn't have the work ethic required to sit and apply for hundreds. She'd rather scroll TikTok and thus, will never get one. Even if she did my life would get worse. The household jobs would never get done, my 1yr old child would get left with me. All for 1.5k Which won't even cover 20% of the expenditure we get through.
She keeps asking me to help her whilst she's depressed, but it's all I've known since the start of this 2.5 year relationship. I clean the house, change more nappies, do all the laundry, pay all bills, drive absolutely everywhere (even though she can drive). I have to go food shopping with her. I'm tired of being over worked.
I have a interest and am very keen to sell my house and start a business that I know I'll do well in, but I have challenges that she wants to move back to her parents home town. That's not what we agreed when we got married. I know what if I move back to her town, I'll work all day and she'll get her mum to do all her work. Not fair.
One of the things that really annoys me is having to sleep on the side of the bed which has the cot next to it. Really annoys me that I have been putting the child to sleep most nights, I wake up during the night when she wakes up, and my wife just makes comments on what I should do to soothe her. I feel like saying why don't you get up move your butt and do it yourself ?. We agreed to take night shifts in turns, it's been my turn now for 10 months straight.
In all honesty I'm tired. This isn't the life I'd imagined before I got married. I wanted the feminine partner who'd rush up to the door when I come back, ask me how I'm getting on and that she loves and trusts me. Instead I get one that just sits on the sofa, when I come back she gives me orders and bs attitude. Even leaving to do anything is just a headache, it's always met with being asked if I really have to go.
She can't be bothered with anything and spend hours scrolling tik tok.
I don't believe in depressed. We're all depressed, this life in a test. But the difference is I still show up and do my share, using depression as an excuse grinds my gears. She's going to counselling but it clearly ain't working.
My question is what I can do improve on my relationship? I'm starting to question whether I even want it.
TL;DR, I cba with my wife not pulling her weight cause she's "depressed" what do I do?