Edit: okay wow I've seen many people say I'm not okay here so I want to clarify sex is not the end all be all in our relationship. I can do without it with my girlfriend and simply pleasure myself. I am not demanding my girlfriend needs to deep throat or other outlandish things. These are thoughts that I find hot, and if it's in her comfort zone, would encourage her to do. I spend times doing sexual acts im not too fond of for her because I would do anything to please her. Also it seems like it takes her around 45 minutes to orgasm at the most. I usually stop whenever she orgams. I don't expect someone to go out of their way to please me just because I do, but it would be nice if she put a little more effort into it.
My girlfriend and I (both 20) have been together for almost 3 years now. We've been sexually active for almost 2 and our times together are always a treat. Whenever we do have intercourse, I tend to make her orgasm first in about 10-45 minutes via penetration and stimulating the clit. She's lied about orgasm at the very beginning of the relationship twice, but seemingly hasn't ever since. Because I can do that to her, I take much enjoyment in that. When it's "my turn", whether it be oral or penetration, she can't exactly make me reach that level. If I'm the one doing most the work ( thrusting, as she doesn't do much) I can climax. However it feels a bit one sided. I can make myself climax between 7-15 minutes if the goal is just to do that. (Should make it clear that I am a guy)
For context, I've literally taken notes on videos snd the woman anatomy as to what I should do to please her most, even to this day if she has trouble communicating what she really likes. And of course, her communication goes is the best. I try explaining what I would like, however I can tell it tires her out quickly, or is too much to ask for. For instance, I like the concept of deepthroating and she's tried to do so numerous times, but says the gagging when deep enough isn't comfortable for her. I wager she could train her self, hell I'm not Bi, but I even tried training my gag reflex to deepthroat a dildo and was able to do so in about 2 weeks. Of course we are different people with different comfort levels, but I know its possible. The same can be said about anal too. Vaginal in any position when she would like to put in effort also doesn't last long, so I take control when she getstired. She's quite short, about 145 pounds, so it might just be a lack of exercise.
Whenever I ask if she would like to practice on her own time, she says it makes her feel bad that she has to practice, and that she isn't capable as is to make me climax. I can understand how it maybe discouraging but from my perspective, I would do anything to satisfy her while it feels like she lacks the confidence to do the same. I'm not that into cunnilingus due to the taste, but I'll still do it for foreplay because I know she likes it. While she will stop giving fellatio in less than 7 minutes because she runs out of stamina. No one is just born to be good at sex, it takes practice and communication. This isn't a jab at her, but I find myself having an immensely better time pleasing myself, than her trying to please me. I want to feel wrapped around her finger the way she does for me. I want to crave her pleasing me the way I do to her (from what she has said).
I love her with all of my heart and she tries her best to show she feels the same in all aspects but am I asking for too much? Am I wrong for asking for her to satisfy me even if it means practice? I like to think we are open, but could this be a sign of a lack of communication?