I'm a sophomore at a small liberal arts college in the US. I really love college overall, but my largest struggle has been socially. I had some worries about my social life when I was in high school — I had a few friends but felt like I wasn't being invited to hang out outside of school as much as other people were (I sometimes felt excluded), and I also felt like I struggled to feel deeply connected to the friends I had (except for one person I met at a summer camp). I also felt like I had many people I was friendly with, but struggled to take the connection to the next level (e.g., more than just talking in class).
I was really hopeful that college would be different for me, and adults in my life told me this would be the case. However, my social life feels even more dull now. I barely ever hang out with people, and I eat meals alone more often than not. I have one friend who I actually do things with sometimes (meals, occasional events), but we don't even feel that compatible and hanging out isn't very fun, it mostly just scratches the loneliness itch. There are many people I know from classes or clubs who I sometimes talk to, but they all have best friends they do everything with, and I struggle to take our connection to the next level and actually do things together. These people don't invite me to things. I've occasionally asked these people if they wanted to hang out with me, proposing something specific, but they say they're busy or something.
I really crave friendship and socialization, and I feel like I'm a friendly, kind, caring, and often funny person. I honestly don't know where I'm going wrong, and I worry a lot about this. This is really affecting my college experience and life overall. Everywhere I look, there are big groups of friends laughing together and going out to events. I don't feel like I've "found my people" at all, even though people told me I would. I have a therapist, and she doesn't know where I'm going wrong (she tends to blame things on the circumstances, not my personality). I was wondering if people have suggestions for me, or if others relate.