Title's a little "Ew", I know. Context: I live with my In-laws and husband. Husband and I have one car, so I take the train when he's working. My husband works as a night cleaner for different businesses, so he needs the car to travel. Unfortunately this is the US so neither the train or buses stop at a reasonable distance from my home. I have to text my in laws to come get me.
On to the embarrassing part, I peed my pants while running to the bathroom (thankfully away from witnesses). I have an over reactive bladder and it's only gotten worse recently. I called my husband, told him what happened, and asked if he could please leave work and come get me.
I thought he would at least try and attempt to talk with his boss, but he immediately said no, and asked if we wanted me to reach out to his mother (61F). I argued that he could talk to his boss, but he said that his team wouldn't be able to clean on time if he came to get me.
I felt like this was a terrible excuse. "Oh no, my wife is stuck there with piss on her leg, but thank GOD the store was cleaned on time!" BTW, I did call my MIL, but honestly I don't want to talk too much about our phone conversation. Just that it involved roping other people into it without calling me back.
I called my aunt (70F) and immediately she was on her way to get me. Something about her response just brought me to tears. I had been trying to just have one person look out for me tonight, and it wasn't my husband. When my aunt picked me up, she said "I love you" and "I'll always be there for you".
Reddit, I can't to the way things were before. This isn't the first time my husband has acted so dismissive. I expressed that I had life ending thoughts, and he took no action. My mother (74F) who lives in another state and my aunt worked to get me into outpatient therapy.
A few years ago, when I was recovering from a knee contusion, there were nights where he left me to hang out with friends. I had nothing to eat but cereal. When I confronted him about this he assumed his sister would take care of me.
One time when his sister had broken her leg she needed to use the bathroom and asked my husband to get her crutches. My husband said "no" and closed the our bedroom door on her. I found out shortly after when she looked like she was on the verge of tears, and I rushed her to the bathroom.
It doesn't seem to matter how much I call my husband out, he repeats the same behaviors. Yes he's supportive, but only when he can get away with doing the bear minimum. I wanted to see how this looked typed out. It doesn't look good at all…
TL;DR: My husband refused to come get me when I accidentally wet myself, citing that his work wouldn't be done on time if he helped me.