So as the title goes… my husband tried to cheat on me a few hours ago.
We have 4 kids with the youngest being 4 months old. He is travel in Europe for a conference and got back to his hotel way later than usual. 3:30am. We texted then were on a call… he was being super quiet and I was just about to hang up with him when a notification from his photography page popped up— I have it on my phone as well and he knows this— or at least did but must have forgotten. The notification was from a girl and was inappropriate. I clicked it and the chat had already been deleted. I immediately asked who this person was and he played dumb and started acting more drunk. I then got kicked out of the instagram.
I went to my own instagram and messaged the girl. I asked her to please share the screenshots of their messages as I was being gaslit.
Well the messages were bad. He approached her at a club and they chatted, resulted in her getting his instagram. In the screenshot I see she sent him a photo, then he said I need to see you right now, what’s your phone number? She gives it and then she shares that screenshot too… he said he regrets not kissing her. That if she is ever in our town to let him know. They continue on with him praising her for what a beautiful, kind, amazing woman she is. Blah blah. There was another screenshot I wasn’t able to capture before it was deleted.
Likely more of the same. Can’t imagine it gets worse.
I’ve never seen this behavior and never thought he would do this. He’s had the typical looking at hoes on instagram prob and has lied about those things— bold face lying to just like tonight. So basically all my trust is gone and I feel like he might as well have cheated.
I feel like he’s risked our family and our children’s solid foundation. I used to feel so proud of him and now I’m embarrassed and disappointed I’ll never get to feel that way again.
He doesn’t know I have the screenshots yet. Our daughter’s birthday is Friday and party Saturday. He comes home tomorrow afternoon. I have basically said I know he’s done something wrong— don’t speak to me about this until after the party.
Any words of wisdom? I am scheduled an appointment with old therapist tomorrow who specializes in marriage consulting.. which we’ve never had. We have had a pretty great marriage so this is hard. I also don’t know if I can get over seeing him talk to that woman that way.