My husband has never gotten me any kind of presents. I am not even that fan of presents. I don't want to destroy the earth with useless shit althought as an autistic pebbler the thought of receiving something would have been nice. We do not have any money so I would have liked atleast some quality time but no.
I wake up as usual to him doing his attention seeking morning things sleep deprived and exhausted as always. He says his usual "come sleep in my arms" bullshit but just teases and bullies me whenever I am close. No food, no drinking just doing what he wants. I prepare his food, provide for him and take care of him. Yeah he is pretty sick with all his illnesses but so am I. Been in nonstop painseizures but he has not given a fuck about them.
What about quality time? I could watch a movie but he cannot physically be quiet and focus for that long. I've been begging for sex for ages but he does not wanna do anything about it. Just using a vibrator wouldn't take that much effort, or even kissing my neck. I'm fine with anything at this point.
I did not receive gift or any quality time or any thought from him. His idea of quality time was letting me do my things. I got to work on building my family tree while he yapped and even take a nap (extremely rare!). He does not let me sleep these days since he needs my attention.
I am so close to actually hurting him and I am not aggressive person at all. It is just that if you kick a dog many times enough the dog will bite back at some point am I right?
He talks often about his parents. How his mother has been writing suicide letters due to the workload her husband gives on her. She is chronically sleep deprived, never has her own time, never gets to eat or drink. Always just serving the husband with nothing else in life. That is also what I am since my husband is not any different from his father. I don't know how to deal with it.
My relatives gave me money and a gift card for my birthday and all of those is going to be spent on my husband. I go to kitchen to prevent I am eating because we are so fucking poor even though I am not eating any actual food because I rather feed him than myself.
Also what is going on with my husban's teasing? Does your spouse just activate your nervous system or other disorders "for fun" even though they cause you enormous pain? When he was a kid he teased the dog so much the dog started growling at him every time he passed. What the fuck is wrong with him.