I really wanted this to work out as a relationship, so I may or may not have reacted a bit poorly to getting dumped… I said I’d never stop loving him (this was over text by the way) because my first instinct was to like… give him a reason to not talk to me,
But then I decided to try and start 2 conversations on two different days. One was the day after, where I wished him luck on his game (he didn’t respond). The second time was about two weeks after (I made a reference to a movie we’d watched together because no one else was getting it. he responded with one message, I sent a final comment, and that’s the most contact we’ve had since).
It’s been a little over a month now, and I just recently figured out that talking to them is the worst possible thing to do. I want him back still, but apparently letting them think things through (without you there), like letting them see what they missed is a thing?
Well, anyway, I’m kinda here with a flaming bridge because of my first instinct to get him to pull away, and it’s eating away at me because I know I want two things:
1. To see him happy
2. to have him back
But the circumstances of him breaking up with me I think were entirely the fact that he had too much on his plate, and his parents don‘t really like me. I know he still cared about me a lot when he broke up with me, and that he still does care a little more than he would care to (He doesn’t have a good poker face and I‘m decent at reading him after 5 months).
I see him just about every day, so the chances of us running into each other at some point in the future is high. I think the thing that he really wanted was time to sort his life out, without the stress of worrying about neglecting someone else. And the hope that it was just that keeps me wanting to keep going and waiting for him.
Then again, I don’t think that’s healthy. Plus, my friends keep saying that they never liked him and that I could do so much better since he’s still so emotionally immature. But I really don‘t know.