This is the situation I am in:
I’m severely ill with ME/CFS, mostly bedbound, and have almost no support system. My boyfriend is currently the only person who helps me with daily tasks, but our relationship has become extremely unhealthy. He argues constantly, ignores my boundaries, pressures me sexually, hides things from me, and talks badly about me. I also react badly because my trauma gets triggered, and our dynamic has become toxic on both sides. I feel trapped because I can’t live independently due to my illness.
These are the people involved:
- Me: end 20s, woman, severely ill with ME/CFS for 13 years
- My boyfriend: 30, man,
- Relationship: together 5 years, living together
This is the outcome that I want:
Either stabilize the relationship enough that it’s emotionally survivable, or figure out a realistic long-term plan to separate safely despite my health limitations.
What should I do to get that outcome?
Given that I can’t leave immediately, what are practical steps people in similar situations have taken to either improve an unhealthy dynamic when dependent on a partner, or to plan a gradual, safe exit when severely disabled? Also I can't get therapy for the relationship because I'm desperately looking for a therapist on my own currently.
TL;DR:
I’m severely ill and dependent on my boyfriend, but the relationship has become toxic. I want advice on either stabilizing things or planning a safe long-term exit.