Back in the pandemic, when I was rotting in my room, I met this guy on a game called Brawl Stars.

Random American dude from Georgia. I thought he was just another rando, but we ended up playing almost every single day for five months straight. Discord calls, late night matches, he became my pandemic soulmate.

Then February 11, 2021 he just… disappeared.

I kept checking Discord every single day for years, hoping he would pop up. He never did. Life moved on, I went to college, got stressed, grew up, but a part of me still thought of him sometimes.

And today… HE MESSAGED ME!

Just a simple hi but I actually froze. My hands were shaking so much I typed like six typos.

We talked a bit and he told me he got swallowed by college and life, and he felt awkward reaching out after disappearing. The whole time I felt this mix of nostalgia and panic.

Then he casually mentioned he has someone now. And I was like oh… okay… cool… happy for you… while my heart did a tiny flop inside my chest.

But tbh… it still felt wholesome. I waited for years without admitting it. Then he came back to let me know he did not forget those months either.

I always enjoyed making online friends. If anyone out there wants to talk or share their stories too, I am always open to meeting new souls like that.


7 comments

  2. Moving on is healthy and in many ways you have, yeah? He is now part of the burnished glow of growing up. Your person is out there.

  3. I feel this. I’ve always had a hard time maintaining friendships, even back in school, and it has become harder since I graduated. Online friends make up at least half of my social connections at this point, and they are by far the more consistent half.

    I also understand the combination of being happy for a friend and being upset about their change in fortunes. When my best IRL friend began dating his now wife I was super happy for him, but I was also jealous as hell. The contradiction is normal.

  5. That’s amazing, I reconnected with an older friend i talked to before it was refreshing

  7. Damn this hit me in the feels. That disappearing act followed by years of wondering “what if” is so relatable it hurts

    The fact he remembered you after all this time and reached out says everything about those 5 months you had. Even if he’s got someone now, that connection was real and clearly meant something to both of you

    Also props for handling the “he has someone” news with grace – that little heart flop was probably inevitable but you kept it classy

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