I’m going to try to TDLR it as much as I can because I’m sure as you all know, families are messy.
Let me sum it up as quickly as I can: My sister (24F) accused me of heinous things, cut me out of her life and made my whole family not talk about me to her. She has done this 5 years ago too for the same reason, except now she has a child.
My parents hid this from me for days (I live in another state so I was asking why I was blocked to my family members) and then finally after a week, my mom told me. I got pissed at everyone who hid it from me saying “it wasn’t their information to tell”.
So for the last 8-9 months, I’ve told everyone to keep us separate and I don’t want to hear about my sister and I don’t want her to hear about me. Mostly everyone has been respectful, but all my relationships has suffered since this. So my mom always asks “how can our relationship be better” and I always tell her, I feel uncomfortable by how close you are with my sister. She say, well your relationship is separate. And I feel like it doesn’t matter, but after talking with 3rd parties, they told me that I shouldn’t be mad at her for still being in contact and supporting my sister.
The 3rd party also told me that it’s okay to ask for space and not talk for a while. I just don’t know what to do because I feel like everytime I see a text that says “how did your week go” from my mom, I roll my eyes because it just seems so small-talky and I hate it. But at the same time, I feel like I don’t want to share how I feel to her. I don’t feel comfortable. And during our text conversations, she always says “I don’t know how to improve our relationship” out of no where.
It makes me mad because it’s like she’s not
happy with how our relationship is but I barely feel comfortable with where we are. I’m still angry, and bitter especially because my whole childhood, my sister was always catered towards. My mom (allegedly) took out a 20k loan at some point to help her. And I’ve never asked for anything, but yet even just talking to me isn’t enough for her.
I’m really close to just saying, I need space and I don’t want to talk for a while but I know I’ll hurt her immensely. I just need some advice on how to proceed with protecting my peace but also not shoving everyone out and making more people pissed off.