We had a few friends over last night, just a chill little hangout with music going, everyone making drinks, trying out a couple new flavors on the bartesian. Then our one friend, the self appointed charcuterie board expert decides he’s going to “handle the snacks.” We figured cool, whatever until he fully took over the kitchen like he was prepping for a magazine shoot.
This man spent almost an hour shaping salami, lining up cheese cubes like soldiers and rearranging grapes with the seriousness of a heart surgeon. And listen, we all appreciated the effort, truly, but it was so unnecessary. There were already other boards and snacks out and we just wanted something to munch on while we kept sipping. Instead, we were literally just standing there waiting to grab anything so we could keep the drinks flowing and try the new mixes we’d set out. He could clearly tell we were getting annoyed too, but nope he doubled down and added garnish like the board was going to be graded.
By the time he finally finished, we were all a drink and a half in and starving. And the board? Totally fine. Not an hour of our lives fine but fine.