I'll start by saying, I've been in a long term relationship until a couple of weeks ago. It had been on the rocks for most of this year as she fell for someone else in June and I found out about it. Things got progressively worse but I was too scared to end it as we had become so embedded in each others lives but it eventually came to a head and it has ended.
As I was pretty much checked out, around 2 months ago, an old vague acquaintance got in contact with me. I'd not spoken to her in since before I met my last partner but we'd stayed on social media. We have the same hobby and she had recently moved back to my city and was looking for someone to do it with.
We started chatting and I thought we got on really well. Same hobby, same music tastes etc. She's spoken to me every day since and we met a couple times a week to do said hobby. She knew I was in a relationship, but I didn't tell her things were bad. Things were a little bit flirty but I didn't do anything overboard, just the odd hug etc. She started asking me out to gigs and telling me places we should go at the weekend.
I told her about my relationship issues and that my partner had moved out and it was effectively over as of a couple weeks ago. The next day, she told me she had split with the guy she was seeing, despite not telling me there was anyone else previously.
I really quite like her, but obviously didn't want to mess her around and told her I genuinely enjoyed spending time with her and talking to her and wasn't just spending time with her as a replacement. We went out on Sunday night, I gave a few subtle touches and a proper hug at the end of the night and told her I had fun with her. I thought she did too. I didn't want to rush things as I've not long come out of a relationship. However, when I got home, I sent a message to say I had fun with her and we should do it more often and all I got was a thumbs up. She hasn't even read my message from the next morning yet despite being online since.
I don't want to hassle her and I feel I've been fairly honest with her. I'm 42 and I'm too old for messing around but she's just ghosted me and not even read the message in 3 days. It seems strange she's gone from 100% to zero just like that when I thought we were getting on great and I've got no idea what I did wrong. I feel like a stupid teenager having messed up two relationships up in a month.
I've been out of the loop for so long and don't know how long to leave it before messaging her again, or even if I should and just wait for her? I know she's been messed around a lot in the past so more than likely has a few trust issues. I don't know what to make of all this and am looking for some outside opinions on what I could have possible done or not done? And if to chase her or not?
tl;dr ghosted after two months and no idea what I did wrong. How to chase without pushing her away?