I’m a male in my early 30’s. I was in a very abusive relationship when I was in my late teens/early 20’s and when that ended I decided to stay single for awhile so I could go to therapy, heal, focus on myself, etc. Right when I finally felt ready to date again, COVID happened. Then I was in an accelerated degree program where dating was not possible (needed to study 12+ hrs a day every day). The years started to pass by quickly but I kept telling myself it would be okay.
Well, I finally feel ready to date again, but this is one barrier I haven’t been able to figure out. I’m obviously very rusty when it comes to even basic kissing. I’m a very good listener, eager to please, and a fast learner, but in the beginning I’m not going to be good at some things. Is there a way to let a potential partner know about this in a tactful way? Seems like I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t when it comes to telling a potential match. I know a lot of people judge potential matches based on kissing and I’m worried about losing out on something good because I don’t have any recent experience.
I was pursuing a relationship with a woman recently (a few hrs drive away) and, due to some common discord groups, we already knew it had been awhile for both of us so there wasn’t as much pressure and we flirted very heavily. Unfortunately, though I liked her a great deal, it ended a few days before she was supposed to spend the weekend with me.