My boyfriend is a 24M American Born Chinese from NYC and I am 23F born and raised in Hong Kong. We met on Hinge and have been long distance for about a year. He came to visit me for a week along with his family and we had breakfast together today, where I met his family for the first time.
Things were civil this morning and it mostly involved his mother telling me about how difficult it was for her to come to the US (she emigrated from China to be with his father) and how she thinks I should plan to go to the US. He said that he thinks I handled the meeting well. However, once he returned to the hotel he mentioned that his parents talked about how my stomach was too big and how they were concerned about how it could be that way at only 23. I'm 5'0" and about 57kg, so I'm a healthy weight, even if it is on the higher end. I just tend to gain weight there and nowhere else on my body. He told them that it wasn't something he minded and that he thought it was fine. I wish he'd have voiced opposition more strongly but it was getting late and everybody in that family was very tired.
Apparently they also discussed how it would be difficult for me to go to the US on my own merit, which he said gave him the impression that they didn't think this relationship was serious enough or that I was good enough for their son. I teach English, which isn't super competitive or high earning. In comparison, my boyfriend is a Big 4 financial consultant, his sister and father are software engineers, and his mother is a doctor. The whole family earns somewhere in the six figures, and while I have considerable savings socked away I definitely don't earn even half as much as that. The whole family is well educated and my boyfriend and his sister were both magna cum laude graduates.
My boyfriend has defended me to his parents before when they said negative things about me or the relationship in private. He'd told his mother "don't assume I'll take your side over my girlfriends, I don't care that you're my mother". There's also some things they do like, but overall I think they have little confidence in the relationship or my worthiness of their son. I'm very disheartened about it and not sure what to do about it. He told me to ignore it and not bend to their will, but of course I'd really want them to like me.
TL;DR my boyfriend's parents expressed some negative opinions and disapproval about me after meeting me and I'm not sure what to do or how to feel about it.