It’s a shitty situation but not that uncommon I believe. We’ve been living together for two years now but I can’t adjust to city life and I miss my hometown and the life I had there. I talked about it with her during the summer and we almost broke up then, but she convinced me that I was maybe acting out of frustration because of all the issues I have with city life. I’ve been going to a therapist to deal with worrying too much and getting triggered too easily. For a short while it worked and I guess I convinced myself that I could and wanted to keep living where we live, because we do love each other. But at the same time, I’ve been fantasizing about how my life would be back in my hometown and the life I used to have, and the thought about going back makes me feel so happy and relieved, that I do believe that I’m not cut out to live where we do now.
She has been adament about where she wants to live and it’s where we live now. I’ve always known this, but because I really love her, I gave it a shot. But now I’m dreading having to break up with someone that I love and see her get hurt. This is my first long term relationship and I’ve never broken up with someone before. When I told her last summer, so was caught off guard and broke down. That really broke me aswell and I cried every day for two weeks. I gave it another genuine shot, but I do believe that I would be way happier back where I was, and that is unfortunately without her.
Now I’m constantly thinking about when I should drop the bomb. We’re currently in week 3 of a 4 week vacation that we had planned all year, but after that I guess I can tell her. I don’t know if I should do it right when we get back or after the holidays, to make them suck less for her.
Sorry for all this rambling, but I’m typing all of this while she is in the bathroom. All these thoughts are running through my head all day and are driving me mad.
When is the best time to tell her and how?