TL;DR: I (19F) love my boyfriend (18M) and we’ve been together almost 3 years, but I feel like we’re too young to be this tied down. He struggles with depression and anxiety and mostly relies on me, so I’m scared to leave and make things worse for him. We used to do substances together (we’re sober now), but sometimes being with him just reminds me of that past version of myself. I love him, but I feel stuck, lonely, and like we’re holding each other back.
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years. I love him so much — he’s been my best friend, my comfort, and my safe place through some really hard times. But lately, I’ve started to feel like we’re too young to be this tied down. I’m only 19, and I feel like I haven’t even figured out who I am yet.
He struggles with depression and anxiety, and I’ve always tried to be there for him in every way I can. He doesn’t have many people in his life, and I’ve become the person he leans on for everything. That kind of pressure has started to feel heavy. I care about him deeply, but sometimes it feels like I’m carrying both of us. I know he relies on me, and that makes me terrified to leave, because I don’t want to see him fall apart.
But staying feels like I’m slowly losing myself.
When we first got together, we went through a rough phase with substances. We’re both sober now, and I’m proud of that, but sometimes being with him brings me back to that part of my life — a version of myself that I don’t want to be anymore. It’s like I can’t fully move on while I’m still here.
i love him with everything in me, but I also feel lonely. He doesn’t really understand my emotions or meet me where I need him to. I find myself craving space, freedom, and a chance to figure out what I want out of life without feeling guilty for it. I want to grow, but I feel like I’m stuck in the same place, waiting for something to change.
i don’t want to hurt him. He means so much to me. But I also want peace. I want to feel light again. I want us both to be okay — even if that means not being together anymore.