He's 32(m) and was in a relationship for over 16 years, since he was a teenager. His only relationship ended about two years ago. His ex didn't love him for a while( this broke him completly), and they broke up because of that. After they broke up, they still hooked up for about a year, casually seeing if he would go anywhere. His ex was with another man at the time, and he found out, and he broke up.
We've been talking for about two months, every day. From the beginning, he was honest and shared everything with me; we talked openly about everything.
He didn't expect to meet me and told me that I(28f) was the first woman he'd been with since his ex. He doesn't have any female friends, only girlfriends from his friends and work friends. He told me that the women he talks to are his mother and me.
He's currently in therapy, and from the beginning, he told me he wanted to take things slow and that it would take time. But things escalated from both of us, and we became intimately involved. From then on, we kept talking, and he said he wanted to take things slow and that he's not ready. Later, he told me that it all happened so quickly and that he was always wondering when he would see me again… it all happened so quickly.
The reason he told me he wasn't ready was:
It's the first time he’s living alone since this relationship, and wants to get used to the idea. He’s working on himself to be ready to date someone and dedicates completely. His type of relationship is meant to be long-term, and that "if im going to do it, it should be with everything i got."
We always had this conversation, but after two months, I talked to him. He told me that he really likes me and that he's created a strong connection with me. We have a lot in common, likes to spent time with me. always payed for the dinners we had.
I asked him if I should wait until he was ready. Yes, I know it's stupid and unfair, but he said he would never ask me that, because he's was in a similar situation before.
We talked a lot and openly, and there may be important things I haven't mentioned here. What do you think?
He said he’s not ready to date SOMEONE. never said ME. he rexognizes that this is stupid but he explained to me everything.
My heart tells me to give this man a chance because I think he's rare these days. But what I was thinking of doing was meeting other people, but continuing to talk to him occasionally as friends.
he was the one who talked to me first i was not looking for anyone, and i’m not looking for anyone right now. only if someone reaches to me.
He himself told me that we could keep talking, that he's here for me no matter what, and to "not think too much, let things flow." We'll keep talking, seeing each other at the gym, and hanging out every now and then.
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edit 1:
i met some guys before him when you can see clearly that they only want sex and all of that… but this one i think he has a different situation. because he was with his ex since his teen years and he said to me he only know to date for a long term. never talked to me in a sexual way, a gentleman.
after all of this he said that he really wants to work on himself and put all the trauma behind me. he really wants someone to share his life and when he’s ready he’s gonna do it, whether i’m in his life or not.