Hey everyone,
I(f30) really need some perspective. My son(m13) recently attacked another student at school. It was a big shock and really upsetting. When I told my (m33)husband, he got furious. Our son locked himself in his room, and my husband ended up breaking the door open to continue their screaming match.
This behaviour is not new for my son, he has been acting our since he started going to school and is only escalating as he gets older so this incident want a surprise for me, he has done this before. But as he gets older and therefore stronger the damage is more. Now he his another boy closed fist straight in the face and threw a chair at him.
I made my husband leave the home for a week after this so we could all gather our thoughts. My son was the one insisting he would come back but I wasn’t sure. I let him come back with conditions.
No one was hurt, but it was a really scary and intense moment. Now my son says he doesn’t want to live with my husband anymore. My husband feels awful and regrets losing control, but he’s also frustrated and doesn’t know how to handle our son’s behavior.
We’re all in therapy now — marriage counseling for us, individual therapy for my husband and for my son. Everyone’s getting help, but things still feel tense and fragile at home.
We also have two younger daughters and a home together. I’m torn between protecting my son’s emotional safety and keeping our family together for the little ones. I love them all, but I don’t know if staying married is the right thing anymore.
Has anyone gone through something like this? Can trust and safety be rebuilt, or is separation the healthier path?