I have dated a lot in my life with a variety of interactions and outcomes, but I've never had a truly bad reaction from anybody I have approached. It's always respectful and usually if they reject me they still seem like they want to be friendly or even friends after.
But these days, I feel like I am a jerk if I even just ask to talk. Not even a date, just going up and saying hey would you like to talk or can I sit here. And I'm only considering this with women very close to my age (like other women in mid 30s) that I assume are single and if they're not thats okay bc truly I just want to talk first im a slow burn person I want to get to know you first.
But why do I have this gut feeling that I am going to cause a woman distress if I approach her even low pressure and casually? Its a powerful feeling bc legitimately I am not at all afraid of rejection or anything like that. I truly just don't want to make anybody else feel any negative feelings and thats keeping me from talking to them.